Relevant Leadership Blog

If You Don’t Express It, You Can’t Expect It

Last week I was helping my friend Sydne Jacques prepare her speech that she is giving this week. One of the lines in her speech that stuck out to me was, “If you don’t express it, you can’t expect it” I love the way Sydne explained it. She said: “Often in our lives both at home and at work expectations change and we don’t talk about it. We need to learn to talk about expectations because I’m convinced 98% of the time that you are sad, mad or frustrated it’s because you expected somebody to do something but they either

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How To Get Free Popcorn

One of the best strategies I know to win with people is to focus on being interested, not interesting. The problem with being interesting is that it’s all about you. But being interested is all about the other person. It’s where influence comes from. It’s placing other people’s interests first. People who are interested know how valuable it is for relationships and friendships to let the other person talk. They listen more than they talk. They allow others to share ideas and opinions. They make people feel welcome, involved and appreciated. I have taught this idea for more than 10

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What Is Your Floor Goal?

  Have you hear of floor/ceiling goals? Most people set ceiling goals. It is the pinnacle of what you want to achieve (the ceiling). The problem is we swing for the fences but often strike out. Goals should be about progress (base hits to carry on the analogy) and so I’ve started setting floor goals as well as ceiling goals. The floor goal is the minimum I’m committing to that still creates progress. As an example – one year ago today, after being inspired by my friend, Jim Cathcart, I committed to doing 100 pushups every day. That is my

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Do You Know Your Value?

I love the lesson this little story teaches A father said to his daughter “You graduated with honors, here is a car I acquired many years ago. It is several years old. But before I give it to you, take it to the used car lot downtown and tell them I want to sell it and see how much they offer you. The daughter went to the used car lot, returned to her father and said, “They offered me $1,000 because it looks very worn out.” The father said, ”Take him to the pawnshop.” The daughter went to the pawnshop,

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At The End of The Day – What Matters Most?

In my personal reading I came across some information about some beliefs of Ancient Egyptians. I found it all very interesting, but I was struck by their belief about what happens when you die. The Ancient Egyptians had a belief that when you died you were met at the gates of heaven and asked two questions. Your answers determined whether you were let into heaven or not. The two questions are these: 1. Did you experience pure joy in your life? 2. Did your life bring joy to others? At the end of the day, the answers to those two

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What Type of a Thinker Are You?

Our mindset, the way we approach life, the way we think about the world around us dictates so much of our happiness. In the book, Supercoach, author Michael Neill outlines three different types of thinking – Acquisition-based thinking places the power outside us in the visible physical world. If we want some of that power for ourselves, we need to go out and get it. When we don’t get what we want, it’s either because the world is rigged against people like us or we just aren’t trying hard enough. Attraction-based thinking places the power outside us in the invisible

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It’s You Vs You Not You Vs Them

On Monday I shared the stage with Rachel Hollis (author of Girl, Wash Your Face & Girl, Stop Apologizing) speaking to a group of entrepreneurs in Michigan. If you don’t know Rachel Hollis, you have probably been living under a rock, but you should check her out.   On Monday she opened the conference and shared some thoughts that I think are worth passing along.   Rachel started by saying “what got you here, will not get you there.”   You have probably heard that saying before but, because it is a trite phrase, I wonder if you have considered

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One & A Half

This summer we have had a 19-year-old family friend living with us. As people have heard he was living with us I’ve had numerous people ask skeptically, “How is that?” The honest answer is that it has been amazing! Brigham has been fun. Our kids love him. And the reason it has worked and we have enjoyed having him is because he is helpful. He is always willing to help. He looks for opportunities to pitch in. He jumps up when something needs done. I complimented him about this by saying, “You carry your weight.” And he said, “No, you

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Simple Ideas for a Happy Life

At church we gave our kids little notebooks and told them to write some of their thoughts and feelings. To reflect on what was important to them. These are the thoughts that Drew wrote. He’s 8 years old & I found his ideas to be very wise: “When I get stressed looking to God is a way to relieve stress. Another way is to do a meditation 🧘‍♂️ Or listening to music 🎶 If you get sad then go to your parents, your siblings or to people who love you 😘 When you feel scared 😱, say a prayer 🙏

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Go Serve Someone

On Tuesday I was running late to the airport.   I decided to park inside to be closer, but there was an attendant at the gate that said it was full and I had to go to the economy parking. I took the trip around the airport to get back to the economy parking and struggled to find a spot. After parking a long ways away from any of the bus stops I ran to catch a bus I could see in the distance only to find it was full. I waited another 5 minutes for the next bus as

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