If you have ever heard me speak you know that the underlying secret to growing your influence is to make it about others. One of the principles I teach is to Practice The Platinum Rule.
Most people teach the Golden Rule which states: Treat Others The Way You Want To Be Treated. Tony Alessandra said, “If applied verbatim, it can backfire and actually cause personality conflicts. Why? Because following The Golden Rule literally – treating other people the way you’d like to be treated – means dealing with others from your own perspective. It implies that we’re all alike; that what I want and need is exactly what you want and need. But of course we’re not all alike. And treating others that way can mean turning off those who have different needs, desires, and hopes.”
That is why when it comes to dealing with people, communication and influence; we need to move beyond The Golden Rule to The Platinum Rule. Treat Other People The Way They Want To Be Treated
The difference is subtle, but in practice it’s drastic. It’s not about you. It’s about them.
The Platinum rule means that as a leader you care enough about the individual to treat them as an individual. It is that extra ingredient that leaders can use in a myriad of ways to build bridges with their people and make them feel valued. It is leading through their eyes, understanding their perspective, and helping them achieve their goals. Leadership is never about you. It is always about them.
2 Responses
This is so true. However I may add that some take it too literal , and lose their own identity and values. It should be used to lead in the right direction. I have tried it and for a while the persons with whom I tried this actually thought I was being a hypocrite. They could not believe that their manager could actually see things their way. However those same individuals over a time recognized the genuine concern I had for them, as well as my commitment to the Organisation to which we belonged. Once that rapport was established it was easy to lead and get things done as they were supposed to be done.
Ty, you are a great leader who has set the bar high by practicing what you teach and reaching down to help others do the same. Your many accomplishments have been inspiring to thousands and I know you will continue to touch many more lives and continue to make a real difference in the World. I feel honored to be a member of your team.