Hello, my friends, and welcome to the Redefining High Performance Podcast. My name is Ty Bennett, and in this short episode today, I want to challenge some conventional wisdom. I want to challenge a phrase that you’ve probably heard before in some conversation around success.
I’m guessing you’ve heard a version of this phrase. You’ve probably heard somebody say, you become the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Have you heard that? I think that was originally Jim Rohn’s quote. John Wooden said it a different way. He said, show me your friends and I’ll show you your future. There’s an old proverb that says birds of a feather flock together. Same idea, right? And here’s the thing. It’s not that I don’t agree with the power of association. I do. I want to challenge a component of that that I think sometimes we’re missing. And our research shows that the power of connection And association is huge when it comes to high performing.
So let me tell you a story. Many of you probably know that my boys, Tanner and Drew, my sons compete in American Ninja Warrior. Well, let me take you back a few years ago. Drew at the time was 10 years old and he was cast or chosen to compete on the show American Ninja Warrior Junior. So this was an exciting thing. We went to LA for filming. And the whole process was just really interesting. He was competing in the nine and 10 year old category at the time, the show had nine and 10 year olds, 11 and 12 and 13 and 14. So three different categories. And the way that the show was set up is they were head to head races. And so they took a field of 64 all the way down to a winner, right? Head to head races, uh, double elimination in most rounds. And so as you won, you would move through and. win through the next round, move through, etc. We went and had a great time. Drew did very well on the show. We had a fun experience and it solidified their love for Ninja Warrior even more and continue to be part of that sport today in a huge way. In fact, we bring it on stage all the time. If you haven’t ever seen anything on that, it’s pretty fun as we talk about high performance and use it as a metaphor. But there was an interesting interaction that we had with somebody at that show. So imagine these kids, they’re all competing all around the country, and they submitted for the show they they wanted to be cast, so they’re connected to the sport in some way, shape, or form. Most of these, like myself, my sons, they had competed in competitions and knew they had some skill there. They’re taking classes, they’re training on a regular basis. There was a a kid who was competing that didn’t do that well on the show but And in conversation with his parents, it was interesting because his mom said something that just has stuck with me. She said, I don’t get it. In all of our local competitions, my son wins every time. I thought he was the best in the country. I didn’t realize there was another level.
I remember that conversation because it opened my eyes to a facet of this idea of connection, who you spend the most time with. And the idea is this, sometimes to play at a higher level, we can’t just be around the people that we have developed a comfort with. I don’t know if you’ve ever had this experience, but you think that you’re playing at a very high level in what you do, and then you get around another group of people and you realize, oh, I didn’t even realize there were higher levels to play. I didn’t know that the stakes were even higher. I didn’t know I wasn’t even competing in the big leagues. I didn’t know that there were people doing this on a much higher level.
And so the challenge that I would bring to this conversation, I truly believe in connection, association, the people that you surround yourself with, all of those things. But the challenge that I would give you is, Are those people challenging you to think bigger, to dream bigger, to act bigger, to push the envelope, to take your performance to another level, and sometimes even just giving you the idea, the permission, the understanding, and the vision that that other level exists?
I’ll give you an example from my world. So as a professional speaker, I am involved in the National Speakers Association. Aptly named, this is for people who do what I do. And some of my very best friends are speakers. I love these people. They’re incredible humans who want to do good, who want to share a message, who want to help people. And there are different levels within speaking, obviously just like anything else. Well, when I participate in events for the National Speakers Association, I have found that there are some levels of people, some people doing this at a really high level, and it stretches my thinking. It stretches my understanding. It stretches my view of the world. It challenges me to go, oh, I could do this at a much bigger level because it’d be easy to just surround myself with, five people who are doing it at the level I am. And I get that we have to grow within that, but the challenge for this week is how do you allow yourself association with people who are performing at a higher level than you to open your eyes to what you could stretch to become? Are there associations that you can be part of in terms of what you do that give you access? Are there conferences that you can attend that maybe you have a chance to interact with those people? Are there podcasts that you can listen to that you can start to understand where people are performing and maybe where you can step up your game? Are there books you can read? Are there people that you can reach out to and try and build a connection and say, hey, I would love to learn from you? and try and build kind of a mentor-mentee relationship.
It’s interesting that I’m sharing these thoughts. I am literally recording this podcast from my hotel room in Florida. I am at a Ritz-Carlton right now at an event that is really fascinating for me. My boys and I are speaking here and it’s an event where the majority of people are CEOs of hospitality groups, restaurant chains, hotels, There are hundreds of CEOs of these big organizations. But then this organization also creates a program for up and coming leaders. So some of these are mid-level leaders, but they’re part of this program called an accelerator where they’re growing in their capacity. And they have access to this room for a couple of days with all of these C-suite, C-level CEO leaders and a chance to be around them, to build connection, to learn from them. And I’m watching these panels of these CEOs sharing their experience, their insight, and I’m just thinking about the amount of leveling up in thought process, in approach, in habit, in performance that’s happening within these emerging leaders. if they go take it and apply it.
That’s the idea, is sometimes until we’re exposed to it, sometimes until we’re challenged by it, we don’t realize that there’s a whole nother level that we could be playing. If we wanna redefine what high performance looks like, I think that we need to allow ourselves to be surrounded by people who are doing this at the very highest level. If you are the highest performing person, in your circle of those people that you associate the most with, my challenge to you is you need to expand that circle. You need to give yourself an opportunity to see people doing this at a higher level, whatever this is, whatever you do is, so that it pushes you in ways that maybe you’re not being pushed now. Association’s incredible. Connection is amazing. Who we surround ourselves with matters. And this week, let’s open doors of opportunity to surround ourselves and challenge ourselves with people who are doing this at a higher level. That’s the takeaway for this week. I hope that this helps you in your pursuit of redefining what high performance is for you. Being able to contribute in bigger ways to the world. That’s why I do this every week. I’m excited to share these messages with you and have these conversations. If this is helpful for you, share this with somebody else. Rate us, review us. Five stars are always appreciated. Hopefully you’re subscribed to this and I’ll bring you a new episode every single week. Thank you so much. I’ll talk to you soon.