Do You Know Your Value?

I love the lesson this little story teaches A father said to his daughter “You graduated with honors, here is a car I acquired many years ago. It is several years old. But before I give it to you, take it to the used car lot downtown and tell them I want to sell it and see how much they offer you. The daughter went to the used car lot, returned to her father and said, “They offered me $1,000 because it looks very worn out.” The father said, ”Take him to the pawnshop.” The daughter went to the pawnshop, returned to her father and said, ”The pawn shop offered $100 because it was a very old car.” The father asked his daughter to go to a car club and show them the car. The daughter took the car to the club, returned and told her father,” Some people in
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Listening Equals Love

Have you ever heard or read a quote that made you stop & ask to hear it again?   Yesterday that happened with this quote by David Augsburger: “Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person they are almost indistinguishable.”   Isn’t that powerful?!   Listening is a skill we all need to work on. Whether it’s in leadership, in relationships, in friendships or parenthood – we can probably all improve in this area.   Especially at a time of crisis when people are hurting, confused, anxious & scared, they need to feel loved (in other words – heard). So I wanted to share a fun test to see if you are a good listener or where you need improvement.   Am I A Good Listener? Steven Ash, “The Career Doctor” developed this listening test. It is a great way to see where you rate
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We’re All In This Together

My mind has gone back to this story several times in the last couple of weeks. Several years ago, my friend Cindy and her kids noticed that two robins had built a nest in one of their trees. As they paid attention to the robins’ activity they realized there were eggs in the nest. Those eggs soon hatched four baby birds. Cindy and her kids took ownership of the baby birds. They loved to watch them and would check on their condition regularly. Then one day as Cindy was putting clothes away in one of the kid’s rooms – she saw something she’d never seen before or since. More than a dozen birds were flying around the tree with the robin’s nest. Cindy rushed out to see what all the fuss was about and saw all different types of birds were attacking the tree. Instinctively, Cindy ran to protect the
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Resilience

La Masia, the Barcelona youth academy who is consistently recognized as being the best academy in the world to train champion soccer players, said that the number one predictor of success is resilience. This last week has been one of the crazier weeks in history. I am sure your life has been turned upside down, as has mine. There are things that are unknown, constantly changing and we’ve probably felt more anxiety and fear than ever before. But, simultaneously I also believe in the human capacity to be resilient. Resilience is defined as the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties. And I think that we are all in need of some strong resilience right now. Research shows that resiliency is a skill that can be developed and there are some common characteristics that add to your resiliency. I have drawn these ideas from the research of Kendra Cherry and Diane
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Influence and Charisma

We all know someone who is charismatic. They have a charm that can inspire devotion in others. My question is: What creates that type of Charisma? What produces that type of presence? One of the biggest keys to influence and charisma is being genuinely happy for other people’s success. When someone achieves something great – do you feel threatened by their success or do you celebrate it? One of the surest signs of someone being comfortable in their own skin is how they see others and how they can separate others experiences and achievements from their own. Too many people subscribe to the idea that tearing others down actually builds you up and it’s just not true. It makes you look weak and insecure because that is where it is actually coming from. People who are secure with who they are genuinely happy for others, they celebrate their success and
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At The End of The Day – What Matters Most?

In my personal reading I came across some information about some beliefs of Ancient Egyptians. I found it all very interesting, but I was struck by their belief about what happens when you die. The Ancient Egyptians had a belief that when you died you were met at the gates of heaven and asked two questions. Your answers determined whether you were let into heaven or not. The two questions are these: 1. Did you experience pure joy in your life? 2. Did your life bring joy to others? At the end of the day, the answers to those two questions are really what matter most! It caused me to step back and ask myself these questions and I wanted to share them with you because I think we can all course correct at times to focus on what matters most. Analyze if you have felt pure joy – and
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Inspire

Each year I choose a word for the year. My word for 2020 is INSPIRE.   The word inspire means to breathe life into someone. That’s what inspiration feels like. It brings you energy, passion, excitement – it breathes life into you.   Part of my focus this year is identifying the people, activities, places, topics, etc… that breathes life into me. I realize that I can’t inspire others unless I’m inspired myself.
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Successful People Ask Questions From A Different Perspective

When I was 21 years old I was struggling in a commission sales position. I wasn’t selling as much as I would like and I just couldn’t seem to influence people. I kept asking, “Why won’t people buy from me? Why am I not influential?” The change started to happen when I began to ask questions from a different perspective. I started to look at it from my prospects’ point of view and ask, “What makes me want to follow and buy from someone?” Putting myself in the prospects’ perspective gave me clarity that allowed me to understand, change, and eventually find great success. Learning to ask questions from the other perspective is a trait of the highly successful. A speaker shouldn’t ask, “What do I want to share?” but rather, “What does the audience need to hear?” A teacher should look at things from their student’s perspective. A manager
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All Excuses Are Equal

Nearly 14 years ago we were a couple weeks away from our first child being born. I was busy growing our business and Sarah was getting everything ready at home. I started the process of recruiting a new sales rep. We had a great discussion and he seemed like this could be a good fit. The next day Sarah went into labor early and our daughter was born. The whirlwind of our first baby took over. We were at the hospital making sure mother and baby were great. Then we brought her home and were trying to figure out what to do and how to do it. It took me more than a week to get back to the sales rep I was trying to recruit. I told him that we had a baby and I was sorry for the gap in our conversations and then he very honestly said,
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A Phrase That Will Make Leaders More Influential

When you’re the leader, the one in charge, it’s far more natural – and far easier – to lecture and command than to discuss and invite. Leaders can create caste systems within their organizations simply by language choices. When they refer to “we” as the leadership team and “you” as the employees, they create a separation in the team. If we want our people to feel like they are in a partnership with us, that we are in it together, that we are locking arms with them to accomplish the overall goal of organizational success, then we need to communicate in a way that creates partnership. The ultimate partner phrase is: “If I, will you …” Examples: “If I set aside time to help fine tune your board presentations, will you have it prepared by Friday to review?” “If I let you choose your people, will you head up the
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