Am I A Good Listener?

Steven Ash, “The Career Doctor” developed this listening test. It is a great way to see where you rate as a listener. Good luck! Give yourself 4 points if the answer to the following questions is Always; three points for Usually; two points for Rarely; and one point for Never.   __ Do I allow the speaker to finish without interrupting? __ Do I listen “between the lines”; that is for the subtext? __ When writing a message, do I listen for and set down the key facts and phrases? __ Do I repeat what the person just said to clarify the meaning? __ Do I avoid getting hostile and/or agitated when I disagree with the speaker? __ Do I tune out distractions when listening? __Do I make an effort to seem interested in what the other person is saying?   Scoring 26 or higher – You are an excellent
Continue Reading

How Does A Person Become Legendary?

I have thought a lot about the word legendary. How would you describe it? When I think about legendary people – they come from all walks of life; they lead families, countries, businesses, movements & religions. They leave their mark. They are legendary. So I developed a set of 5 questions that I am asking myself & I want to invite you to ask yourself if you want to live legendary lives. Are you focused on being important or focused on doing important work? Are you focused on how much you make or are you focused on how much impact you make? Are you worried about fitting in or focused on standing out? Are you seeking popularity or are you seeking mastery? Do you concern yourself with being served or with serving others? Save
Continue Reading

Resume Virtues vs. Eulogy Virtues

How do you want to be remembered?  Would you rather be known for the business deals you brokered and the fame you amassed or the people you helped and relationships you had?   David Brooks, in an editorial titled “The Moral Bucket List,” developed the concept that there are “two sets of virtues, the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues. The résumé virtues are the skills you bring to the marketplace. The eulogy virtues are the ones that are talked about at your funeral.”   Both types of virtues are important and worth pursuing and honing, but only eulogy virtues have any lasting value and legacy.  Developing résumé virtues is fairly straightforward.  You read more books, you practice, you develop skills & you get more education.  But the development of eulogy virtues is not as clear-cut.  It involves a lifetime of making good decisions and prioritizing things of lasting value.
Continue Reading

Research Pays Off

A few weeks ago I was speaking in Omaha, Nebraska for Centris Federal Credit Union. When I got to my hotel room there was a gift basket waiting for me from the team at Centris. It was a very nice gesture but the reason I am writing about it was because they took an extra step that most people don’t take. They had done their research and the gift basket was full of things that I personally like. (Personal note: Dr. Pepper and Licorice are the keys to my heart) I was reminded of how much a little research pays off. Before you meet with a potential client, team member or partner – take a few minutes to research what they like, dislike, etc… It will give you insights into that person, allow you to personalize your approach and customize the conversation. I recently had a meeting with a potential
Continue Reading

When Was The Last Time You Made Someone Feel Special?

I want you to take a minute and ask yourself this question: When was the last time I made someone feel special?   When was the last time you went above and beyond to make a difference for someone? When was the last time you did something for your spouse, your kids, your team, or a stranger?   I was inspired last week on Valentine’s Day by an 8th grader named Ryan.   Last year on Valentine’s Day, as a 7th grader Ryan noticed some girls had more flowers and gifts than they could carry and others had nothing, He decided he wanted to make every girl feel special on Valentine’s Day and so Ryan made a goal to present a carnation to every girl at American Fork Junior High.   He started working odd jobs around his house and doing all he could to make enough money to carry out his goal
Continue Reading

People Support What They Help Create

One of the key lessons I teach leaders is that – People Support What They Help Create. Our world has changed, and rapidly. Fifteen years ago, if you wanted your voice to be heard, you pretty much only believed it was heard if you held a position of leadership. Social media has changed all that and I don’t mean just because people have Facebook or Twitter or LinkedIn where they can go and voice their opinion. It has changed the psyche of our world. It has caused everyone to feel like his or her voice should be heard. Regardless of where people are in your organization, they mentally believe that their voice and their opinion matters. As a result, our top-down directives don’t work the same way they used to. We can’t just throw things at people and expect them to jump on it, to run with it, and go for
Continue Reading

One of My Favorite Stories For The Lesson It Teaches

One of my favorite stories illustrates the dramatic effect increased confidence will have in your life. It is story written in 1914 by Harry Leon Wilson, called Bunker Bean. Bunker Bean’s parents died when he was a child leaving him to grow up on the street. As an adult Bunker Bean struggled to survive. He was weak and timid as he lived in fear, struggling from job to job just to make ends meet. Then one day as he was living in a boarding house he met a man who was a spiritual medium. The man convinced Bunker Bean that he had special powers and he taught him about reincarnation. The medium taught him that people had lived before as other people, and that for enough money, he would tell Bunker Bean about his previous life. Bunker Bean scraped together the money after a couple of weeks and upon paying
Continue Reading

What is your major goal for 2017?

As you approach the new year & set Goals/New Years Resolutions for 2017 I want you to think about your primary goal. What is your main goal for 2017? What is the one goal, that if achieved, will make the whole year a success? What will your contribution to the world be in 2017? Most people, when they set goals, focus on balance. They set several goals for every area of their life. I’m not against that, but years ago I learned that the word for balance in Hungarian is the word egyensúly. It actually translates to mean “one weighted focus” That understanding has changed my approach to setting goals and I’ve found that if I have one major objective it actually allows me to balance & prioritize my life around it. I also believe it has allowed me to make a bigger impact because I focus on major contributions &
Continue Reading

Service Makes You Happier

One of the reasons that I love the Holiday Season is because of all of the good that is done in the world. We focus on others, serve those around us and look for ways to help. When I was in high school, I decided that our DECA club needed to do something that brought us together and provided service. As we discussed it, one of the girls suggested we provide Christmas for a family who needed it. We all got on board, soliciting donations, money, and food. With a monumental effort, we showed up Christmas Eve at the front door of a tiny home in downtown Denver with three SUV’s packed full of Christmas. We had toys, candy and clothes for the four kids, food to fill their pantry, and some money for the parents. As we brought in the first presents I set them down next to a
Continue Reading

What is Your Word For 2017?

Every year I choose a word: one single word that I focus on throughout the year. It becomes the subject of my study, the focus of my thoughts, and it defines the traits I wish to gain in that year. Like Benjamin Franklin’s 13 virtues, my word becomes part of me in that year. The first year I started this I chose the word communication. I always felt like I was a natural communicator but I wanted to turn a raw talent into a strength. At the time I wanted to become a professional speaker and was speaking regularly in building our business. I read books on communication, presenting, public speaking and story telling. I worked very hard to eliminate any filler words from my speech, such as um, or ah. I recorded myself every time I presented, either in audio or video, and analyzed what worked, what didn’t work, and
Continue Reading